These last few days were Heaven, but right now I’m already missing you. As I told you this morning, our life now is a constant mix of “hellos” and “goodbyes”, with the video calls in between. I never thought it would hurt so much to see you go away; to have a son living in another country. I was hardly prepared for it, and it hurt deeply. For months I pined for you, thinking of the happy moments …
Category: Family
You left us a few days ago. Your soul finally left your body, where it had been incarcerated for such a long time. Your frail, old, decaying body that was but a pale shadow of what it used to be; and each day that went by you decayed a little more, and each day I was sorrier to see you that way. I looked at you and wondered how it is possible for someone to come to this …
There’s a recent song by Ed Sheeran called “Visiting hours”. I’m not really sure about the story it tells, but it must be a sad one, and every time I hear it I remember my visits to Mom and the pain I feel to see her as she is, not to mention the pain she must be feeling herself. Mom was an independent woman if ever there was one. She went to university, graduated, and took a job …
I was offered a book of short stories from a Portuguese author for Christmas. I had never read any of her books, and wasn’t particularly interested, but I have to say it was a pleasant surprise. I really enjoyed the stories, stories about women and their loves, struggles and achievements. The story in the book One story reminded me of you. Actually, there were two stories, or rather two sides to the same story: that of a mother …
When dusk falls it’s the hardest part. The darkness, the silence, the lack of people. It used to be a full house. When I came home from work, it might be dark outside, but all the lights would be on; Mimi busying herself in the kitchen, preparing dinner, and the boys in their rooms, studying or getting ready for their rugby training. Occasionally they would be in the living room watching something on TV, or with friends who …
I drive and I listen to my Spotify list, and I hear the first sounds of “Airport”, a song by The Motors I heard back in my teens, and I think how appropriate it is for these days of my life. Although it’s not a ballad, “Airport” is a sad song, about parting, about putting distance between two people, about saying goodbye. Yesterday I just left my elder son Afonso at Lisbon’s airport – he was flying …
Many years ago, in my teens, “New Kid in Town” was one of our favourite ballads, and the fact that it immediately followed “Hotel California” on the vinyl record meant we had about ten solid minutes of slow songs to dance without interruption, which might be good, if you had the right partner, or disastrous, if not… Still, it was a song that we warmed to, and I still have it among other precious oldies on my Spotify list. …
It seems impossible, but it’s been two years since I stepped on Lisbon airport and boarded a plane. In August 2019 I travelled to Madeira, as I’m doing now, and little did I know what would be hitting us in a few months’ time. Looking back, these two years have brought many changes to my life, and I’m not just talking about lockdowns, social distancing, wearing masks and feeling there’s a threat hanging over our heads all the …
Some songs are just nice to listen to; some others, though, carry a strong message that goes straight to your heart. “You’re Not There”, by Lukas Graham, is an infinitely sad song whose lyrics tell a story of pain and loss. From the first time I heard it, it sounded like a heartfelt message from a son to a mother or father (or both) who died prematurely. Years later, the child talks to his missing parent, saying he …
In Britain they call it Boxing Day . No one knows exactly why it is called like that, but the most plausible theory is that it has to do with holiday gifts, handed over in a “Christmas box”. December 26 is also St. Stephen’s Day, an early Christian martyr who was stoned to death. In our family, as in many, I expect, it is a sort of “day after”, a day of hangover, when you try to recover from …